Author Topic: Chuck Norris rewind (Read 3311 times)

Flyin6 · « **on:** February 27, 2021, 08:57:19 AM »

Once Chuck Norris and superman fought to see who was the toughest man ever. The loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants
forever!

Flyin6 · « **Reply #1 on:** March 01, 2021, 10:28:03 PM »

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird!

Flyin6 · « **Reply #2 on:** March 02, 2021, 09:23:13 AM »

Want another one ;-) ??

Flyin6 · « **Reply #3 on:** March 02, 2021, 09:24:27 AM »

When Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity

He got it back!

Amazing...

Flyin6 · « **Reply #4 on:** March 02, 2021, 11:02:01 AM »

Hmmm, no reaction

What about this one:

He can beat the sun in a staring contest!

EL TATE · « **Reply #5 on:** March 02, 2021, 11:40:30 AM »

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them

EL TATE · « **Reply #6 on:** March 02, 2021, 11:41:56 AM »

Chuck Norris’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, because no one fools Chuck Norris.

Atkinsmatt · « **Reply #7 on:** March 02, 2021, 12:34:34 PM »

Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups. He pushes the earth down.

Atkinsmatt · « **Reply #8 on:** March 02, 2021, 12:41:02 PM »

Every year the flu gets a Chuck Norris shot.

Nate · « **Reply #9 on:** March 02, 2021, 01:17:42 PM »

Who would have thought an airman would be known as the baddest man on earth.....lol

Flyin6 · « **Reply #10 on:** March 02, 2021, 10:49:54 PM »

For some reason a man's left testicle is larger than his right

With Chuck Norris, each one is larger than the other!

JR · « **Reply #11 on:** March 03, 2021, 01:13:13 AM »

Atkinsmatt · « **Reply #12 on:** March 03, 2021, 07:50:21 AM »

Chuck Norris named his daughter Mercy. That is the only time he has ever had mercy.

cj7ox · « **Reply #13 on:** March 03, 2021, 12:51:58 PM »

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

cj7ox · « **Reply #14 on:** March 03, 2021, 12:58:34 PM »

A cobra once bit Chuck Norris on the leg. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.

Flyin6 · « **Reply #15 on:** March 04, 2021, 12:06:29 AM »

Chuck Norris once hit a man so hard...

That his blood began to bleed!

Atkinsmatt · « **Reply #16 on:** March 04, 2021, 09:16:05 AM »

Chuck Norris was exposed to the coronavirus. The virus is now in quarantine for a month.

Flyin6 · « **Reply #17 on:** March 04, 2021, 10:42:57 AM »

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet...he scares the crap out of it.

cj7ox · « **Reply #18 on:** March 04, 2021, 12:22:41 PM »

Chuck Norris was once asked how many push-ups he could do. He replied, "All of them."

cj7ox · « **Reply #19 on:** March 04, 2021, 12:23:40 PM »

Chuck Norris' tear can cure all disease. Unfortunately, Chuck Norris never cries.

Flyin6 · « **Reply #20 on:** March 05, 2021, 12:25:45 AM »

Quote from: cj7ox on March 04, 2021, 12:23:40 PM

Chuck Norris' tear can cure all disease. Unfortunately, Chuck Norris never cries.

Pity! ;-)

Did you know he uses a stunt double

For his crying scenes?

cj7ox · « **Reply #21 on:** March 05, 2021, 12:12:36 PM »

Quote from: Flyin6 on March 05, 2021, 12:25:45 AM

Quote from: cj7ox on March 04, 2021, 12:23:40 PM
Chuck Norris' tear can cure all disease. Unfortunately, Chuck Norris never cries.
Pity! ;-)

Did you know he uses a stunt double

For his crying scenes?

Yep! The stunt double was generated from a strand of Chuck's beard hair.

Flyin6 · « **Reply #22 on:** March 05, 2021, 06:55:18 PM »

Quote from: cj7ox on March 05, 2021, 12:12:36 PM

Quote from: Flyin6 on March 05, 2021, 12:25:45 AM
Quote from: cj7ox on March 04, 2021, 12:23:40 PM
Chuck Norris' tear can cure all disease. Unfortunately, Chuck Norris never cries.
Pity! ;-)

Did you know he uses a stunt double

For his crying scenes?
Yep! The stunt double was generated from a strand of Chuck's beard hair.

I knew the man was strong but I have it on good authority that once when speaking to a large audience he sneezed

Afterward several women discovered they had become pregnant!

TexasRedNeck · « **Reply #23 on:** March 08, 2021, 09:11:54 AM »

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Flyin6 · « **Reply #24 on:** March 08, 2021, 03:42:46 PM »

Quote from: TexasRedNeck on March 08, 2021, 09:11:54 AM

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

And if you play the sound made by the first atomic detonation, slowly, backwards...

It is his name!