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Offline Flyin6

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Fatherless...
« on: June 18, 2015, 10:45:11 AM »
I have long thought that the most effective tool of Satan is a father who has been turned (away) from God and his obligations and his family
If Satan can destroy the man, then the family...the whole family will surely family

That means that we men are going to be under attack. We are going to garner attention from the evil one because if he gets us, he gets the wife, the daughter, the son, and maybe even some adult parents as well.

So we, men, must lock arms, and stand firm on the word of God. Stand together and for our little part, Not give one dam inch to Satan. Stand with me!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6IVyO-aoOU#t=115
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Offline Flyin6

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2015, 10:46:08 AM »
Secular view here, but she has some good points. The message behind what she says is clear to me. Fathers...God...Standing on the Word.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JpFzanztmB4
« Last Edit: June 18, 2015, 10:52:48 AM by Flyin6 »
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Offline EL TATE

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #2 on: June 18, 2015, 10:51:14 AM »
At your side brother.
Husband, Father, Gear guy, Patriot.

Offline Flyin6

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #3 on: June 18, 2015, 10:53:11 AM »
At your side brother.
I know you are!
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Offline Atkinsmatt

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #4 on: June 18, 2015, 11:32:58 AM »
Here as well.
Matt
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Offline Flyin6

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #5 on: June 18, 2015, 11:36:07 AM »
^^^Real Men
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Offline Dawg25385

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #6 on: June 18, 2015, 01:17:46 PM »


Not an inch
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Offline cudakidd53

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #7 on: June 18, 2015, 05:33:35 PM »
Synergistic power in standing together! 
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"When you're dead, you don't know you're dead. Hence, dealing with this fact is not difficult. It is only hard for those still living around you.....It's the same when you're stupid."

Online TexasRedNeck

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #8 on: June 18, 2015, 09:07:49 PM »
This is the essence of fellowship.  True believers who support one another and rely on God for strength.  Thank you brothers for being here with me.

Psalm 57:2
I will cry to God Most High,
To God who accomplishes all things for me.
Kids today don't know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.

Joshua 6:20-24

Offline rasimmo

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #9 on: June 19, 2015, 01:24:44 AM »
Amen and count me in. Real God fearing men have to stick together.

I've had the obligation to confront a couple close friends who we're running off in the ditch. It's not an easy thing to do. If you love your brothers you have to be able to speak the truth to them and be willing to give a swift kick in the rear if they need it. I pray that someone will do the same for me if the need arises.

Offline Flyin6

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #10 on: June 19, 2015, 09:23:36 AM »
I did that once for a friend, fellow warrior.
He wasn't saved, but I knew him through many years, special operations and maybe 3-4 years of combat tours we served together.
He went astray one night and I called him.
Nearly went to a fight
Later when trouble came to him and he was at his lowest point, one night, he called me
I told him about Jesus, and he accepted the Lord as his savoir
He is now a changed man for the most part
Got away from the bad influences and really turned around
Takes courage to look a guy in the eye and tell him the truth, but for his sake, you need to do it!
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Online Nate

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #11 on: June 19, 2015, 11:35:40 AM »
This subject strikes a nerve with me and it strikes very hard. 

I grew up without a father because the woman that gave birth to me had her issues with him and she put those issues between my father and my sister and I.  I was taken out of my home when I was 6 and basically grew up in the foster care system.  The woman’s excuse for sending me away was “because I reminded her too much of my father”.  Now whether or not that is the truth, I could really careless.  I have gotten over that and basically choose to not have her in my life.  I cant stand liars and people that just cant take responsibility for their actions regardless of how things went down.

Fast forward to May 2006, I got divorced and custody was given to my childs mother for the pure fact that I was an active duty Soldier.  I have diligently paid my child support every month regardless of how bad it hurt financially, and have done everything in my power to maintain some sort of contact with my child.  Well the bottom line is, I have not had any contact with my daughter for the last 8 years.  By choice you ask?  The answer is hell no!  Every time I have called, sent letters, gift for Christmas/birthdays they have been returned and/or have been told that she does not want to talk to me.  So now I know what my father must have felt like, because whatever the issues were that my ex-wife has/had with me have been put in between my daughter and I. 

I have held hope that once my daughter turn 18 she will choose to make contact with me, and that we can have some sort of a relationship free of her mother influence!

Now, lets be real here.  Both of these videos play to the side of the mother and just how wronged they have been, and just how horrible the father/male race is.  This is truly some archaic stone age thinking.  Why is it that we as men continuously let ourselves be talked about as though we are some incompetent pieces of crap that know nothing other than how to make fire and act like monkey’s……..?!

I am just going to stop right here!  Because the more I think about this, the more I get upset and somebody is going to get their feelings hurt with my comments.
Nate

Give me coffee for the things I can change and Bourbon for the things I cannot!

Offline Flyin6

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #12 on: June 19, 2015, 12:01:07 PM »
That's tough Nate
Biblically, there is a case for what happened to you.
Familiar with the concept of the sins of the father?
Basically it is all about a generational curse. For example in one generation one of the parents is given to drinking or depravity, or stealing or so forth.
You often see it in the siblings having the exact same problem...The problem simply transitions to the next generation, hence, generational curse.

Ever hear the phrase, "The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree?" simply an observation on this biblical principle of generational curse.

What do we do about it? Is there anything we can do about it? Yes there is. Through the power in the name of Jesus, one breaks the curse in his generation. Since this site is about Real men and our problems and issues, we are talking about taking responsibility, manning up and doing all those things to correct that which is wrong with us and our past.

So, that's just it right there. break the curse. Fix it in your generation. Nothing some of us can do with unreasonable spouses, but God can. If we give it all over to him and remain obedient to do what he says to do in his word, he will be obedient to his word as well and do what he says he will.

Not sure if this helps, but it is what immediately came to mind when I read the last response to this thought provoking thread.

And I am not all that inexperienced in this area. My first wife...drugs, other men...you name it. And me, a young soldier trying to straighten up my life. She got custody and I got child support in the divorce. Same thing, judge saw the child would have more stability in a home with a mother who used drugs and moved fairly often than with a soldier in the US Army. So I paid that support, to a court, so they would dole it out to her.

But when I finished flight school, a young officer walked up to her and flatly told her that she had one choice. Give me our son to take away and raise or I would not quit until I proved in any court we found ourselves in that she was an unfit mother, was mentally ill, was a drug abuser, and anything else I could dig up. And, it worked. She tearfully signed the paperwork and I got to take Little Don to Germany where that kid just blossomed.

Just sharing...we are all more alike than we ever thought back in the D-Max forum days, eh?
« Last Edit: June 20, 2015, 09:43:38 AM by Flyin6 »
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Offline Sammconn

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #13 on: June 19, 2015, 12:09:50 PM »
I too have seen this. But I was the one who came to the rescue of a broken woman and 8 month old boy. His father was in all sorts of trouble, drugs booze women etc.
he was not the good guy that paid anything.
We went through hell for years, and the deadbeat just kept playing the game.
Fast forward to the time my son was 12 or so, he started to see the light.
At 16 he was finally old enough to be able to take my name, which he wanted badly by this point. He has witnessed far to much for a young lad. Today he is approaching 21 years, he s has occasional contact with him, but tries to coordinate it with grandpa there to mediate.

I guess the point of it all is, with time all that is right will come out.
You've all done right, and God willing the children will see it.
I just don't want to wind up missing a digit or limb.  I can sometimes get in a hurry to get results.
Sam

Offline rasimmo

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #14 on: June 19, 2015, 12:10:10 PM »
I was sitting here trying to figure out a way to reply, but Don beat me to it and I can't top that. There are absolutely bad mothers and bad fathers in this world. The main reason divorces end up so ugly is because it was never part of God's plan. Just keep trying. One day your daughter will see through all this mess and make her own decisions about you and everything else that happened in her life.

Offline JR

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #15 on: June 19, 2015, 01:42:24 PM »
Nate, that is tough and the system is rigged against men. I have watched it first hand many times.

You are doing what you have to and what is right, but there needs to be a "right" for you too. Now I am no lawyer for sure, but you have the right to see and visit your daughter. You must ask for it, short, supervised or not, so she can see who you are, not who she is told who you are.

If they can order you to pay, they can do the same for visits. Not really sure how old she is but waiting until she is 18 may provide so much "other" influence you may regret waiting. I know I could not,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

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Offline Atkinsmatt

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #16 on: June 19, 2015, 02:02:09 PM »
I got bent over in the court room as well.  Do the right thing.  Always try to see your kid.  I paid on time.  Eventually he saw more and more of the truth.  It took 12 years but my son decided to come live with me and the fight was on.  There were some bad times with her telling him the Deputy was coming to take him and such. The fight was worth it.  Today, at 21, he sees his mother when he wants.  I saw him a lot when he was with her, thankfully, but she had tremendous influence that will never be fully reversed.  Make special efforts to see/contact her.  It will be well worth it.  Even if at first she reacts negatively. 
Matt
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Online Nate

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #17 on: June 19, 2015, 04:45:19 PM »
she turns 18 in 20 days.

thanks for the support
Nate

Give me coffee for the things I can change and Bourbon for the things I cannot!

Offline JR

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #18 on: June 19, 2015, 06:06:25 PM »
Well then hope she looks you up or pass the offer to see who dad really is.

I can only imagine how tuff it is though,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
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Offline EL TATE

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #19 on: June 19, 2015, 06:45:13 PM »
Sam has been "my" son since 2003. His Dad is coming to visit tonight, after about 6 years of no contact. Sam's going to be 18 in Feb, and while apprehensive, he realizes that he really doesn't even know him, so he's at least willing to give him a shot. He knows who his real Father is and even asked if I was OK with him coming up. Don't give up on it Nate; she may not even know you've been reaching out until you get past the gatekeeper.
Husband, Father, Gear guy, Patriot.

Online KensAuto

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Re: Fatherless...
« Reply #20 on: June 19, 2015, 09:54:20 PM »
Good luck with that Nate, I'm sure it will turn out well, in time.

I'm on the other side of that story. I married a women (former neighbor and friend) that had 4 beautiful girls with a deadbeat dad. He still, to this day, will not call or reach out to his girls. ..and even though this guy is a dipwad, I have never ever talked negative about him in front of the girls.....they already know who he is, they don't need my input.

I look forward to your happiness, it will come....guaranteed !!
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